Commitment

Commitment.....what are you committed to? We had 4 great talks in church sunday from a family who is new in our ward. Their two daughters are in Young Women. One is older and is really a lot of fun and one who is younger and has special needs. I really enjoy both of their girls so much. Their family seems very well put together. I am giving credit to their mom...she must be an amazing woman! Their special needs daughter is a breath of fresh air to me. I love her. I am amazed at how instantly I have loved her. She brings happiness to my soul when I look at her and watch her interact with the others. Anyways...their parents and these two daughters talked on sunday. I was so impressed. Their dad talked about commitment and it really hit home with me. I have been thinking about it all week in fact. What am I committed to? I can make lists and list of things that I am committed to right now.
1. Feeling sorry for myself that Rob's business has slowed down and money is tight, especially since I just cut back to part time.
2. Eating things that make me sick and feel worse about myself.
3. Making time to watch my tv shows that I love so much.
4. Spending time on the computer when I clearly have so much to be done around the house.
5. Feeling mad
6. Feeling helpless
7. Worrying
My list can go on an on. I have struggled with this. I know in my heart what I want to be committed to. What I love more than anything else in this world. It is amazing to me how easily it is to lose sight of why we are here and what really matters in this life. It seems to take tragedies in our lives to wake us up. It is easier to get caught up in others lives that deal with our own and what needs to be done.
I am going to be doing this 3 month challenge with the girls. One part of it is positive thinking. As I have looked in to this more and "tried" it out on myself I am amazed at how many negative thoughts I tell myself on a daily basis. I have become good a rationalizing or justifying my thoughts in my mind. For instance, I always think to myself if I could just get out of the city and move home. Move to a small town I know I could be more focussed and less of the world. Whether this is true or not, it is not my reality and until that day comes when I am able to get out of this rat race I need to be committed to what is right, not what is convenient or easiest. I am tired of the excuses I tell myself of why my life isn't what I want it to be. I sometimes feel I am wasting my good quality time on things that dont really matter.
So today I am renewing my commitment. Commitment to things that are most important to me in my life.
1. I am committed to taking better care of me so that I have the energy and patience to take care of others.
2. I am committed to helping my kids in whatever they need.
3. I am committing my time to doing good and serving others.
4. I am committed to God and living his teachings.
5. I am committed to my husband and family
My list could go on and on. I am thankful for all the many things I am blessed with in my life. I am thankful for my children and that I am able to help them grow in to God loving, hard working adults. I am thankful for church and the constant reminders of what we need to be doing in our lives. It helps me keep focussed on what really matters. I am thankful for my husband and how I have grown to love him. He works hard for us and I appreciate it. I know I will fail and lose sight once again of what matters, but for today I am COMMITTED!